by Mackenzie P.
From Disney princesses to celebrity couples, we are often told through the media that a pivotal part of our experience is related to finding our soul mate. As I’ve gotten older (20 years and counting), I’ve come to recognize some misconceptions about relationships that are common in the minds of girls. I also realize that a lot of beliefs I had when I was younger are untrue and worse, unhelpful.
Here they are:
MYTH 1: Your prince in shining armor will save you.
TRUTH: You are your own prince in shining armor, the only one responsible for your life is you and how you treat yourself will be mirrored by those around you. No one is going to rescue you from the dragon or the bad grade you got on your paper, that’s all you! You’re the only person that is always going to be there for you. Make sure you treat yourself well and prioritize your development and happiness!
MYTH 2: Your soulmate is out there, there is only one “the one”.
TRUTH: You will change a lot throughout your life, and the type of people you get along with will as well. My best friend still thinks that there is one person out there for everyone, but there really isn’t. Just like best friends, each friend is different and you’re allowed to have more than one throughout your life, and you likely will as you grow and change!
MYTH 3: You don’t need any romantic relationships in your life, you should only focus on yourself.
TRUTH: You should do whatever makes you happiest. Because of this advice from my mom, for a long time I thought that relationships were only going to end in hurt and it left out a part of life that can be really fulfilling. Everyone is different and everyone will find their own balance, but one thing is for sure, you can’t know if you never try!
MYTH 4: A romantic relationship will complete you.
TRUTH: In my experience, the best romantic relationships have been the ones that are similar to friendships. You love them and you love hanging out with them, but at the end of the day, you’re still your own person. You should be able to have a full and complete life outside of your relationships and that will make it all the more interesting when you do spend time with your sweetheart.
MYTH 5: You and your partner need to like all of the same things.
TRUTH: Prioritizing similarities is good, but think about how great it might be to expose yourself to new perspectives. Differences can be good and can help balance out the relationship. Imagine dating someone who was exactly like you. Not that interesting, is it?
Relationships are great ways to grow and you have lots of time for them throughout your life so there’s no need to rush. In my experience, when both people in the relationship are comfortable with themselves then the magic can truly happen.